Archive for the 'Geek Stuff' Category

Dec
25th
2006

Wiisteria.com learns the ropes of internet prostitution

By Kaiser Dämmerung

By creating a MySpace page.

Cybernetic attention whoring for the win!!! I've already registered quite a few of you, but if you're still not in Wiisteria's list, go ahead and add us! Even if you don't have a Wii! it's one more friend! Add me Add me Add me Add me Add me Add me!

Needless to say the page is doing just fine. It's been less than a week and we've had a handful of subscriptions already, we hope that Myspace (and other contacts I happened to get a hold of) can get more Wii owners out of the darkness and into their brand new, squeaky clean home.

Did I mention that the page looks FANTASTIC ...Keep reading.

Dec
20th
2006

WWW.WIISTERIA.COM IS GO!

By Kaiser Dämmerung

OMG YOU GUYS!!!!! DID YA KNOW!!! THERE'S A BRAND NEW WII PAGE OUT THERE! *GASP* AND IT'S FOR PUERTORRICAN WIIS!!!!

Finally, our work is [amost] done!!!1

Gawd. It's been almost two weeks of designing, coding, debugging, screaming, cussing, bickering and bitching, but we got 'er done. DS and I gave birth to a beautiful baby webpage, which we plan on making grow until it destroys the whole internet.

I already showed you a logo, now here's the whole thing:

OMG WIISTERIA!

Don't worry it's geared mostly towards puertorrican users so it's in spanish (international users are also welcome).

Basically the whole point of this page is to provide this island's thousands of Wii owners with an easy place where to meet other contacts and exchange Wii numbers, since Nintendo went out of it's league to ...Keep reading.

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Dec
18th
2006

Sorry for the lack of updates…

By Kaiser Dämmerung

But if you've been lurking around DS's blog lately you'll notice he mentions something about us working on a website.

We've been at it for the past 2 weeks or so, trying to launch a project that came into my mind in one of those rare hours of workplace boredom. What's the page about? Let's just say that it has to do with this Christmas' must-buy-puertorrican-black-friday-frenzy-inducing item. And no, it's not fucking "Fondle Me Elmo".

You know what? let me give ya a little clue. Here's the logo:

 

This is the first full-fledged website I've visually designed for myself since that horrid yellow nightmare that was my portfolio (no, I won't link to it again, it's too painful). I mean visually designed because I'm working graphics only. DS, of course, is ...Keep reading.

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Nov
21st
2006

Kaiser’s STATE OF THE GAME ADDRESS

By Kaiser Dämmerung

WARNING: this thread is so GEEKY it will have you wearing pocket protectors by the time you're done reading.

My fellow Gamers:

I HAVE NO LIFE.

This Christmas, unlike any other Christmas I have ever spent in the history of... well... everything, I have so many games and game systems that I don't even know what to do with my life. It's disgusting.

I remember back in the 90's, with no money, no job, and barely any games to play with, surviving only through the "charity" of Blockbuster Video, who kept my gaming thirst in check with their rentals. I was so desperate to play i didn't fucking EAT so I could save money to rent a game on weekends. And sometimes I was lucky enough to save for half a game and my parents begrudgingly agreed to lend me the other half.

Fast forward to today:

5 consoles and a PC. SIX GAMING PLATFORMS. Good grief. Now I ...Keep reading.

Nov
17th
2006

As of this Sunday, Nintendo will own my bank account

By Kaiser Dämmerung

BOW TO ME

-Shigeru Miyamoto, Nintendo's Head Game Designer, creator of Zelda, Mario, Donkey Kong, Star Fox and Pikmin. Also referred to as GOD.

The evidence:

Wiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!

As of this Sunday: Don't call me, don't message me, don't even bother looking for me. I will be parading around Hyrule and I don't even know when I'll come back. If you have some business with me, feel free to leave me a voicemail or email, or what the hell, even a written letter. None of them hold the possibility of me answering, but you're free to give it a try. If there is a God (Miyamoto!) I'll probably answer.

See you in the distant future!

Older Stuff

Praise the Lord… While rockin’ the fuck out!

Oh yes ladies and gentlemen, you bet your ass some money hungry Christoids want a piece of the profitable band simulation market. After the rampant success of Guitar Hero and Rockband, they needed to find an excuse to cater to all those "young sheep" whose brains are so wiped of all independent thought to the point where they are not allowed to hear or even like mainstream popular music. And what better way to do ...

Well I’m just a teenage dirtbag, baby

Meet Aliana Lohan. For those of you that are at least aware of the lifestyles of the rich and heinous and numerous websites devoted to them, she's the younger sister of ambiguously lesbian whorebag trainwreck actress/"singer" Lindsay Lohan. I usually don't pay attention to Z-list little shits like her, but when she opens her mouth and spouts stuff like THIS, it's ...

The Potato Peel Crisis

So DS wanted to make potato salad. Eh, why not. He makes a damn good potato salad. Great, today's lunch menu is decided. Soon enough I see him in the kitchen doing something that looked... questionable. No, he wasn't doing lewd things to the potatoes or drizzling them with any sort of "special dressing", he was just pushing tons and tons of potato peels through the trash disposal. But really pushing them like an unwanted ...