Name: Kaiser
March 31, 1980
1:00 AM
Time Zone is AST Santo Domingo, DR

Rising Sign is in 05 Degrees Capricorn.
You are practical and reserved but very ambitious. An achiever and a hard worker, you respect success. Older looking and very serious as a youth [Nuh-uh bitch, who you calling old? just look at these cheekbones!], things lighten up and you relax more as you mature. You have a serious view of the world as being a difficult place to be in. Very envious of those who seem to have an easier life than you have, relaxation and play do not come easily. It is important that you had abundant parental support as a child so that you do not feel lonely and isolated as an adult. Generally, you have a good, earthy sense of humor that can carry you through when times really do get tough. You are purposeful, self-willed, industrious, realistic and responsible.

You are practical and reserved but very ambitious. An achiever and a hard worker, you respect success. Older looking and very serious as a youth [Nuh-uh bitch, who you calling old? just look at these cheekbones!], things lighten up and you relax more as you mature. You have a serious view of the world as being a difficult place to be in. Very envious of those who seem to have an easier life than you have, relaxation and play do not come easily. It is important that you had abundant parental support as a child so that you do not feel lonely and isolated as an adult. Generally, you have a good, earthy sense of humor that can carry you through when times really do get tough. You are purposeful, self-willed, industrious, realistic and responsible.

Sun is in 10 Degrees Aries.
By nature, you are very energetic and high-spirited. You are fiercely independent — you must be first in everything you do, and you enjoy taking risks. You are the one who will rush in where angels fear to tread. Quite brilliant at initiating new projects, you are terrible at following them through to completion. [*sigh*]You are an enthusiastic leader but you tend to be a reluctant follower. Often you are quick to anger, but you usually recover just as fast, regretting later things you said when you were upset. One of your best traits is that you are simple and direct, blunt and honest — just be careful you do not hurt others’ feelings. Your need to be competitive at all costs may provoke resistance from others, but, as long as you maintain your usual Sunny good humor, this should not prove to be a major problem for you.

By nature, you are very energetic and high-spirited. You are fiercely independent — you must be first in everything you do, and you enjoy taking risks. You are the one who will rush in where angels fear to tread. Quite brilliant at initiating new projects, you are terrible at following them through to completion. [*sigh*]You are an enthusiastic leader but you tend to be a reluctant follower. Often you are quick to anger, but you usually recover just as fast, regretting later things you said when you were upset. One of your best traits is that you are simple and direct, blunt and honest — just be careful you do not hurt others’ feelings. Your need to be competitive at all costs may provoke resistance from others, but, as long as you maintain your usual Sunny good humor, this should not prove to be a major problem for you.

Moon is in 06 Degrees Libra.
Affectionate, warm and friendly, life must be a "beautiful" experience for you [Oh sure, I'm practically frolicking on top of hills singing about the sound of music...]. Unpleasantness should be avoided at all costs. [Derrr!] You tend to overlook other people’s faults and you would rather give in than fight. You are uncomfortable with strangers, but at ease and sociable with friends and associates. Indeed, you would rather socialize than work — you can use your prodigious charm to avoid unpleasant tasks. You need the support and assistance of another in order to get you started on any new project — you are not a self-starter. Be careful of a tendency to be overly self-indulgent (i.e., lazy). Your refined aesthetic sensibilities attract you to music, dance [Ha!], art and any other cultured activity.

Affectionate, warm and friendly, life must be a "beautiful" experience for you [Oh sure, I'm practically frolicking on top of hills singing about the sound of music...]. Unpleasantness should be avoided at all costs. [Derrr!] You tend to overlook other people’s faults and you would rather give in than fight. You are uncomfortable with strangers, but at ease and sociable with friends and associates. Indeed, you would rather socialize than work — you can use your prodigious charm to avoid unpleasant tasks. You need the support and assistance of another in order to get you started on any new project — you are not a self-starter. Be careful of a tendency to be overly self-indulgent (i.e., lazy). Your refined aesthetic sensibilities attract you to music, dance [Ha!], art and any other cultured activity.

Mercury is in 13 Degrees Pisces.
Your ideas and thought processes do not come to you in an orderly, logical fashion [when have they ever? wait a minute, you mean... Thoughts are supposed to be in ORDER?!]. Instead, you think with your feelings or with images produced by your rich and fertile imagination [In other words: You will SUCK at math]. A very subjective person, your dreams and fantasies are very important to you. You trust your intuitions and tend to reject ideas that are based solely on logic. Very impressionable, you are sensitive to the moods and emotional states of those with whom you come into contact [And lucky me, I absorb them as well. Goddamnit].

Your ideas and thought processes do not come to you in an orderly, logical fashion [when have they ever? wait a minute, you mean... Thoughts are supposed to be in ORDER?!]. Instead, you think with your feelings or with images produced by your rich and fertile imagination [In other words: You will SUCK at math]. A very subjective person, your dreams and fantasies are very important to you. You trust your intuitions and tend to reject ideas that are based solely on logic. Very impressionable, you are sensitive to the moods and emotional states of those with whom you come into contact [And lucky me, I absorb them as well. Goddamnit].

Venus is in 26 Degrees Taurus.
You are known to be a warm and affectionate person, and you tend to form long- lasting attachments. The reverse of this is that you can also be quite possessive once you have made a commitment. The beauty, luxury and comfort of your surroundings are important to you and you will devote much time and energy to making your home just right. Beware of your tendency toward self-indulgence [Dahling, one can never have enough mink stoles], especially with respect to eating incorrectly [*Looks @ rapidly developing potbelly* ...Oh SHIT]. You also need outside stimuli to get you in gear. When things come too easily for you, you can be lazy and indolent. [Ok ENOUGH with the lazyness already I get it!]

You are known to be a warm and affectionate person, and you tend to form long- lasting attachments. The reverse of this is that you can also be quite possessive once you have made a commitment. The beauty, luxury and comfort of your surroundings are important to you and you will devote much time and energy to making your home just right. Beware of your tendency toward self-indulgence [Dahling, one can never have enough mink stoles], especially with respect to eating incorrectly [*Looks @ rapidly developing potbelly* ...Oh SHIT]. You also need outside stimuli to get you in gear. When things come too easily for you, you can be lazy and indolent. [Ok ENOUGH with the lazyness already I get it!]

Mars is in 26 Degrees Leo.
You are a very proud person. Strong, bold, courageous and self-possessed, you love to be the one to initiate significant actions. When people expect a lot of you, you respond positively and will work hard in order to maintain their respect. But when your dignity or pride is threatened, you tend to become sarcastic, arrogant and domineering [In other words, a Total Fucking Bitch]. Try not to take any challenge or resistance that you meet as a personal affront. You are very stubborn about your right to live your life according to your own principles.

You are a very proud person. Strong, bold, courageous and self-possessed, you love to be the one to initiate significant actions. When people expect a lot of you, you respond positively and will work hard in order to maintain their respect. But when your dignity or pride is threatened, you tend to become sarcastic, arrogant and domineering [In other words, a Total Fucking Bitch]. Try not to take any challenge or resistance that you meet as a personal affront. You are very stubborn about your right to live your life according to your own principles.

Jupiter is in 01 Degrees Virgo.
You feel most expansive and at ease with yourself when you are doing something that you consider to be practical or useful. You enjoy being dutiful and carrying out responsibilities. You gladly take on the little tasks that others seem to want to avoid. At times, you carry things to extremes and feel guilty anytime you do something that you consider to be self-indulgent [Erm... not really]. While it is appropriate for you to demand little for yourself in life, try to loosen up once in a while — go out on a fling and enjoy yourself!

You feel most expansive and at ease with yourself when you are doing something that you consider to be practical or useful. You enjoy being dutiful and carrying out responsibilities. You gladly take on the little tasks that others seem to want to avoid. At times, you carry things to extremes and feel guilty anytime you do something that you consider to be self-indulgent [Erm... not really]. While it is appropriate for you to demand little for yourself in life, try to loosen up once in a while — go out on a fling and enjoy yourself!

Saturn is in 22 Degrees Virgo.
Your life must be orderly and practical and full of known and familiar routines in order for you to feel comfortable with yourself. Be careful, however, not to let "order" become the be-all and end-all of your life, or you may become cold, crass and unfeeling. Doing useful, practical things boosts your self- esteem. Abstract concepts and reasoning seem frivolous and a waste of time to you. You are very critical of yourself (and others), indeed at times quite self-deprecating. Try to relax a bit and allow yourself the freedom to fail once in a while. [UNACCEPTABLE!! Hmph!] However, you probably won’t fail very often because you are such a perfectionist.

Your life must be orderly and practical and full of known and familiar routines in order for you to feel comfortable with yourself. Be careful, however, not to let "order" become the be-all and end-all of your life, or you may become cold, crass and unfeeling. Doing useful, practical things boosts your self- esteem. Abstract concepts and reasoning seem frivolous and a waste of time to you. You are very critical of yourself (and others), indeed at times quite self-deprecating. Try to relax a bit and allow yourself the freedom to fail once in a while. [UNACCEPTABLE!! Hmph!] However, you probably won’t fail very often because you are such a perfectionist.

Uranus is in 25 Degrees Scorpio.
You, and your peer group, demand to confront life at its deepest and most meaningful levels. Very compulsive and obsessive in your approach to everything, you will avoid anything that is casual or superficial, especially when it comes to relationships. You will seek out and explore new methods of healing as well as different ways to deal with deep-seated emotional problems.

You, and your peer group, demand to confront life at its deepest and most meaningful levels. Very compulsive and obsessive in your approach to everything, you will avoid anything that is casual or superficial, especially when it comes to relationships. You will seek out and explore new methods of healing as well as different ways to deal with deep-seated emotional problems.

Neptune is in 22 Degrees Sagittarius.
You, and your entire generation, are heavily involved in investigating and idealizing foreign and exotic intellectual systems and religious philosophies. The most extreme ideals will be pursued with gusto [I wonder if the Illuminati can be brought back...]. You will be at the forefront of humanitarian attempts to improve the lot of those who are in need of assistance. You will be comfortable with the concept of the "global village." [Where, of course, I am the village elder]

You, and your entire generation, are heavily involved in investigating and idealizing foreign and exotic intellectual systems and religious philosophies. The most extreme ideals will be pursued with gusto [I wonder if the Illuminati can be brought back...]. You will be at the forefront of humanitarian attempts to improve the lot of those who are in need of assistance. You will be comfortable with the concept of the "global village." [Where, of course, I am the village elder]

Pluto is in 20 Degrees Libra.
For your entire generation, this is a time of radical changes in society’s attitude toward marriage and interpersonal relationships [Nooooo. Really?]. There is a general fear and awe at the power inherent in making emotional or contractual commitments — they will not be entered into lightly.

For your entire generation, this is a time of radical changes in society’s attitude toward marriage and interpersonal relationships [Nooooo. Really?]. There is a general fear and awe at the power inherent in making emotional or contractual commitments — they will not be entered into lightly.

For your entire generation, this is a time of radical changes in society’s attitude toward marriage and interpersonal relationships [Nooooo. Really?]. There is a general fear and awe at the power inherent in making emotional or contractual commitments — they will not be entered into lightly.

N. Node is in 28 Degrees Leo.
You prefer to take the leadership role when it comes to dealing with others. You enjoy administering and organizing group activities. Others tend to listen to your suggestions because you aren’t usually overly domineering or patronizing in your interactions. You love to entertain in a big way — you’re at your best when throwing a large and lavish party [Sweety, dahling, try the Ors d'oeuvres. They're to die for!] Your popularity and social success are assured as long as you don’t take others for granted — resist the temptation to become snobbish and arrogant. [Shit.. Too late.]

What do you think?

[ ] Right on the money

[ ] Right on the money

[ ] Right on the money

[ ] What a load of bullshit!

[ ] They forgot to mention the word "Diva" in a few places

[ ] They forgot to mention the phrase "Drama queen" as well

[ ] They forgot both Diva and Drama queen. It’s useless

[ ] Oh goody. What’s next. Your romantic profile?

[ ] You better crank up the dirty, humiliating stuff on this blog!

[ ] I am very concerned about this chart. According to it’s planetary positions, you are supposed to be the AntiChrist

Posted in Frivolities, Reveries |

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